Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I see through liars

How do I become a Buddhist, and can someone explain Buddhism to me?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

‘We tried and it didn’t work out’: CDPR co-founder says it shouldn’t stray from AAA open-world RPGs - Video Games Chronicle

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

The New Twist In Regeneron's 23andMe Bankruptcy Buyout - Investor's Business Daily

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand how hurricane paths work

Vancouver Whitecaps lose Concacaf Champions Cup final to Cruz Azul - MLSsoccer.com

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have a reading level above third grade

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Why is every human messed up in some way?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

What is a good tool for product analytics besides Google Analytics?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Yes, You Can Change Outfits In Nightreign , But Not At First - Kotaku

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Japan Is Ready to Fight a $385 Billion Annual Polluting Beast by Offering a Greener Alternative to Traditional Cement - The Daily Galaxy

I can count

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I actually pay taxes

The Roman Empire at the time of Christ kept meticulous records. Why then, is there no record of the trial of Jesus?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can read

Trump's sons distance themselves from new Trump-branded crypto venture - ABC News

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Angelina Jolie And Brad Pitt’s Daughter Shiloh Reintroduces Herself With New Name - HuffPost

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Amazon planning $10B investment in North Carolina for data center and AI campus - AP News

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I took the same Oath and took it seriously